You handle all of my searches, so you know pretty much everything about me. You own my browser, so you know pretty much everything I look at, even though you pretend to have privacy policies. You own my phone’s platform, and so you know when and who I call. You know when I’m searching on Maps. You know when I’m sending an e-mail and who I’m sending it to. You know the videos I watch. You’ve even handled thousands of dollars for me in a Google Wallet account (even though that was the most unpleasant experience of this decade). You’ve banned my teenage self’s videos from Youtube. You’ve put political cartoons on your homepage that quite frankly weird me out. You’ve hosted contests I’ve attended. All the startups I meet want to be either you or Facebook. You’ve been the topic of several of my blog posts, and this one is for you:
Larry and Sergey, you did it. Who knew. Wow, none of this even existed in 1998. We were stuck with Altavista, Yahoo, and AOL… And then you came along. Sure, Amazon stuck around, too… But they didn’t create self-driving cars or anything. You revolutionized the internet. Your slogan… “Don’t be evil.” Now, that’s forethought. Because you’ve been a public company for a few years now. And you’ve made ALOT of money off of ads. Ads I’ve bought but never sold anything with, nonetheless.
You are a story that will be told to future generations. It will be one of the greatest cautionary tales of all time.